I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
