I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
