I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
