hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
