Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
