I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
