So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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