He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
