WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
