i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Randomize