plz talk dirty to me
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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