omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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