I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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