I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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