I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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