To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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