I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
