sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
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