He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
