it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
