So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
