margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
