i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
