I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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