Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
