we're blogging at a bar
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize