I think scott just propositioned me for sex
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Don't tell me you're on acid again
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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