No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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