this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
