I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
