just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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