So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
