Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
