Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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