its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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