dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
this will be a night to untag.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
