dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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