its not stalking. its research.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I want her autograph on my taint
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
