I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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