I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
