I showed him my bush... on skype.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize