Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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