Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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