Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
