singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
