Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
