if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
