i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
