i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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