Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
The best revenge is premature balding
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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