booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
