Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
